A few things I believe

The following list is in no particular order, and should not be construed as having any relevance to anything:

1. Financial Peace University should be taught in every high school in America.

2. Osama bin Laden doesn't give a damn that we're free. Platitudes that suggest otherwise serve no purpose other than rallying the masses.

3. Two Hearted Ale is a great beverage, and could be the reason Elvis is hanging out in Kalamazoo.

4. Patriotism and Religion are important for pacifying and uniting the masses.

5. Dan Quayle was right when he said that a mind is a terrible thing to lose.